Will Not Live In Fear

When the summer began, I had complete confidence that blogging would be a huge part of June, July and August...turns out, I'm pretty busy doing other things! Though fixing up the house, playing with my husband, enjoying time with friends, and working out are probably better uses of my time, I still miss writing! Hopefully I will find a balance in the coming weeks.

Now for the nitty-gritty.

About a month ago, I opened up about doctors appointment that rocked my confidence. I was told that my BMI calculated out to that of an obese person. After a short mental struggle, I made the conscious choice to move past the statement and continue on my fitness journey. I've been swimming a few days a week, lifting, hanging out with Erin Motz for my morning yoga, and generally moving forward.

Whoo-hoo for moving forward!

However, the "your fat/no I'm not" revelation was not the only concern to come of that appointment. For the last few months, my female system hasn't been working the way it should. In other words, Aunt Flow came to visit in February and has yet to make a full exit. While she may go on the occasional weekend getaway, she's never far from home. As a result, my doctor is switching me to a new pill. I was supposed to make the switch immediately after the appointment...one month ago...but I chickened out.

Around the same time last year, I made another BC switch, and that transition ended up triggering a tailspin in my life. I could no longer control my emotions. I was weepy. I was self conscious. I tried my best to put on a happy face, but I would crumble the moment I was alone. It was a dark time and a time I never want to revisit. Almost five months had passed before I realized what had initially sparked the depression, and by then my body had adjusted.

Needless to say, anxiety strikes my heart each time I think about what might happen after this new change.

Thankfully, after finally opening up, my husband and my closest friends are aware of what I went through. The situation is out there. I am out there. This time, I will not be bottled up in my head, wishing away the pain.  Instead, I will face anything that comes my way with strength...and backup :-)

Besides, all this anxiety may be for not! It is summertime! I am not in the process of moving to a new town, taking a new job, and missing my husband at the academy. Fear is the only thing in my way, and I cannot live a life based in fear. I am strong now, and I have found so much more value in myself over the last few months. Combine all of the above, and I have a compelling argument for a smooth transition.

I've got this. I make the switch this weekend.

Bring it on! I've got backup! 

My number one supporter and my partner till death do us part!

God had a plan for the two of us. Best friend and sister for life. 

Roommates.com brought this blessing to my life, and it hasn't been the same since. 

The Best Backup

The Best Backup

The Best Backup

The Best Backup 

The Best Backup

The Best Backup

The Best Backup

Shameless plug for Erin Motz's next challenge. She is amazing and is releasing another FREE 30 day challenge in August. The kicker is that she will only release it if there is enough support! If you have any curiosity about yoga, or already love it, go sign up here!